year of the machete (the NBA saved itself)

Lou Williams is a basketball player for the Philadelphia 76ers. Prior to the NBA season starting, Lou Williams was celebrating Christmas by driving around Manayunk, when a robber approached his car with a gun. Lou Williams looked at the robber and said "I am Lou Williams, 6th man and by far the most clutch player on the Philadelphia 76ers. Instead of robbing me, why don't I treat you to McDonald's drive-thru". The robber liked this idea and opted to not rob the rich man and hopped in.

The above story is true because Lou Williams not only said that it was true, but he also tweeted it. While most of my tweets are lies (when I feel like tweeting), I feel confident that all athletes speak the truth. Why would Lou Williams make up such an absurd story? Would-be robbers should be allowed to roam the yuppie hills of Manayunk. Just pack your cars full of McDoubles.

Other thoughts and observations of the first half-week of the NBA:

1. The NBA is by far the greatest league. I go back and forth with MLB, but Stern smacked some sense into me when he prevented CP3 from going to the Lakers. The Lakers freaked out and traded Lamar Odom to their main rival for nothing, deciding that giving Odom's minutes to Josh McRoberts is the way to go (and after watching some of the Lakers-Bulls game on Christmas day, it might not be that bad of an idea after all. Mike Brown on the other hand is a terrible idea). Also, the Timberwolves signed JJ Barea for a lot of money for a lot of years. I love this game.

2. The Knicks look good, which is important because I am a Knicks fan. They beat the Celtics, who didn't have Paul Pierce, which is a sign of improvement since they went 0-8 against them last year (thanks to Marv Albert for the stat). Iman Shumpert was the only one on the team not nicknamed Melo who really impressed me. Then he sprained his MCL and the Knicks were forced to sign that point guard kid out of Harvard because there other options are too old (Mike Bibby) or too fat (Baron Davis). It's weird to miss Raymond Felton.

3. I remembered that League Pass was free for a few days, so I decided to watch the Wolves-Bucks game instead of the Heat-Celtics that TNT was forcing down my throat. Ricky Rubio looks better than expected. He somehow makes easy passes seem extremely difficult, however, so I expect Michael Beasley to be confused for most of the year. Derrick Williams and Kevin Love should work well together, so if the Wolves can somehow ship JJ Barea (and thus, break up "Los Lobos") for a SG, they will be pretty fun to watch.

4. My secret santa sent me a machete (not lying).