Broad Street diary

I was sitting around earlier this year with Sarah, Scoot Jackson, and O'Regan. We were watching the Philadelphia Union play their very first MLS game against the Seattle Sounders and we were also talking about babies and free dirt, among other topics. Then the conversation turned to the Broad Street Run and we all agreed that we would sign up.

I had no desire to run the Broad Street this year because I ran it last year and it is pretty close to Fancy's due date. But since Coleman and O'Regan were in, I decided I would do it. For those of you who don't know, the Broad Street Run is an annual 10-mile run in Philadelphia. The race starts at Broad and Olney and goes south to the Naval Yard. There are no turns. And there are no hills. It is a straight run. A straight run for ten miles. It is more or less like running on a treadmill with 30,000 other people. Everybody who lives in Philadelphia does it at least once. In my case I did it twice.

I sort of downplayed the Broad Street Run this year. With the completion and near-victory of my first ever marathon fresh in my mind, I figured that I didn't need to train too hard to beat my previous time of 1.30.48, because 10 miles is 16.2 miles shorter than the marathon I just (almost) won. I also figured that I didn't need to use the ol' anti-chafe stick under my shirt. Both of these assumptions would destroy me.

I showed up to the marathon this year not as early as normal. Instead of showing up 5 hours early, I only got there 2 hours early. I parked at Citizens Bank Park, boarded the Broad Street Line, and headed north. At Olney, I decided to walk around the hood. It was fun and gross. 30,000 runners and 100 or so port-o-john's does not equal success. 30,000 runners and abandoned buildings equals something else entirely. I was not letting anyone take the tissues I had jammed into my pocket.

I didn't see Scoot or O'Regan, and I am not sure if they ran or not. I'm pretty sure Scoot is still stuck in Iceland. Whatever it was, I did see Mark from college. We talked for a minute about how we always run into each other at random times, and then I went wandering deeper into the hood. After a good hood walk, I decided to get to my corrall and get down to business.

While waiting for the gun, I did my stretches, which basically consist of tying my shoes. Mayor Michael Nutter did his talking, the wheel chairers and the elites were sent off, and then eventually I was standing at the starting line. That's when I realized it was hot. For the first time I wish I ran a little more post-marathon. The gun goes off, and away I go. At mile 1, I threw my water bottle into a trash can and tried dodging the walking geniuses that started in faster corrals. At mile 2, I was sweating. Luckily, the city was kind enough to open all the Broad Street fire hydrants, and there were water stops every mile. I think 35 people needed medical attention during the race, which seems like a high number for a ten mile race. But it was honestly hot. I myself needed medical attention as my shirt was showing blood around the left nipple region. Gross! Shoulda used anti-chafe. My original goal of knocking ten minutes off my time was not achieved. Instead I settled for an underwhelming 1.27.45. I got back to my car after grabbing a pretzel and a Skinny Water (THAT'S RIGHT) and scooted on home to mow the lawn.

Next race: Victory Brewery 5K. End of May.

Marathon Recap

I finished my first marathon this past Saturday on a pretty dope Spring day in the nation’s capital (Ashkhabad, I mean Washington DC). While I wasn’t sure what to expect, the experience was definitely cooler than I could have imagined. I wouldn’t rank it as high as major life changing events like getting married or finding out that we’re having a kid. It also falls lower than such significant events as witnessing Helmet Catch or getting drunk on a boat and then jumping into the ocean off a rope swing while the Venezuelan Coast Guard laughs at you before their shift ends and they are forced to go home and watch 8 hours of Chavez TV. But I would rank completing a marathon on the third tier, alongside Sam’s Choice intramural basketball team’s improbable playoff win over the #1 seed in the 2002 League C Championships.

The only reason I wanted to run a marathon was because people said it was a bad idea. I like the idea of “crazy” even though a marathon is not really all that crazy. There are many things that outrank a marathon on the crazy scale such as hanging out with Ben Roethlisberger or playing racquetball blindfolded. I remember conversations with Unky Joe telling me that it’s stupid to run a marathon. He’d then tell me about his friends who went through all sorts of issues after completing a marathon, from blisters to ulcers to dehydration and vomiting to other stuff that I can’t remember. He then would add, why don’t you run two half-marathons instead? I probably said yeah, that’s a good idea, and then thought ok, definitely running a marathon now. Besides I’m used to the awful feelings associated with doing fun things, since I’d say one-third of my life was committed to getting as drunk as possible. It was this dedication to drinking, along with the terrible hangovers that followed, that told me that running a marathon was absolutely necessary and definitely tolerable. In retrospect, the post-marathon death-feeling wouldn’t come close to cracking my top 10 list of worst hangovers.

I wanted to run the Philly marathon in November this past fall after finishing the Philly half in September or October but Sarah said nah, you should train more. That made sense since the half marathon marked the longest distance I had run to that point, so to figure out double the distance in under two months would have been difficult. So I decided to look for a local Spring race that wasn’t in May because running a marathon before driving Sarah to The Birth Center seemed like an all-time bad idea, so I figured March was good. The two localest marathons were Virginia Beach St. Patrick’s or the DC National. I chose DC because it was closer, and after spending a billion dollars, I was registered.

The next step was figuring out the best way to train for it, so I decided to read an article or two in Runner’s World. I decided on the training program that had a couple days off in the week. Running more than 5 days in a week is not necessary and probably even bad for training because your muscles need to recoup or something. Maybe that’s true. I believe it and away I went. The only thing I remember from my training program was to take two days off. The rest said something about interval training and occasional cross trainings, so I decided I would just run every day until I got bored or tired. I decided that it was important to run a long distance each week. The next week you would try to run farther. The third week you’d chill a little bit. Then the fourth week you’d run longer again. Excellent plan.
In addition, I consulted some of my friends who have run marathons in the past for their advice. Chris, the 100 miler in the group, offered me a pretty specific plan. He said I needed to hit a certain amount of miles in a week before a certain date. It was pretty intimidating. But he runs 50 and 100 mile races, so I figured he was a little bit too tough. James and Ronit also had some training tips that I ignored. As the weeks wore on, James dumbed it down for me and told me to hit 20 miles by the end of February (the race was March 20th) and I left it at that. I decided 17 was sufficient. Ronit gave me some good diet tips which included, double up on bananas the week of the race and eat lots of salt to help retain water. She also told me to drink a bunch of water (what Sarah calls a “Slam Dunk”) and a Gatorade the night before and the morning of. She also told me to make sure I get water/Gatorade at each of the water stops for the first half of the marathon. I did this happily as I made a game of seeing how much Powerade I could pour on my stupid shirt. It turns out I am awesome at spilling shit.

With excellent training and diet behind me, not to mention incredible flexibility due to the fact that I am married to a yoga instructor, I was all set. I got down to DC the night before and hung out on the Metro. On the way down I realized I forgot to pack my race shirt, which was going to be an Alaskan Brewery shirt. This was the greatest mistake I could make because I was forced to one of those lame-ass running shirts (highlighter yellow) at the marathon expo. Thanks to this shirt, and good use of the anti-chaffing stick, my nerps did not blerd. These running shirts, along with anti-blister socks (spent $11 on one pair of Nikes), applying anti-chaf between your toes, and making sure your shoe size is the size you are supposed to be wearing (I wore 11s for half the year when I was definitely a size 12) are the only advice I can give you on how to not be messed up during/after the marathon. Another tip would be to learn about stretching, which I have not done yet, because my hamstring screwed up at about mile 22, which I could have prevented since being married to a yoga instructor is not the same thing as doing yoga. The hydration and use of Gu also helped avoid dehydration related headaches and actual dehydration. Yet another tip would be to absolutely read Born to Run by Christopher Macdougall. That book is dope.

Damn this is longer than I wanted it to be already. The race itself was fun. It started at 7, so I decided to wake up at 4, so I can get there by 5:30, so I can make a game while waiting for the race to start at the DC Armory. The game was “Let’s see how many bathrooms I can find and use.” The answer is all of them. I found the employees only bathroom. It said authorized personnel only behind this point. I decided that I was authorized and did my thing in peace. The other bathrooms were super crowded. Runners are a foul bunch. At 7, the race started. I was a little nervous, but I was annoyed because while lining up I realized I had to pee again even though I went 45 times already. I decided I’d just start running and the urine would just sweat itself out. This plan failed miserably, and the first 9 miles were spent wondering if I could die from not allowing myself to use the restroom. The answer of course is yes you definitely can, as water intoxication has taken the lives of many shock jock radio game show contestants (hold your wee for a wii). At mile 9 I thought it’d be good to take a whiz, so I stopped and waiting for a nasty port-a-potty. I picked the right line behind a couple of guys who only needed to do some standing, so I was in and out after only about a minute wait. The bad part about taking this piss was that I spent the first 9 miles worrying about having to take a piss which conveniently distracted me from the distance that still needed to be covered. So when I started running I was annoyed because I still had 17.2 miles to go, which was .2 longer than the longest I had ever run before. So this is when I started to just run and space out. I think I sort of hit that runner’s high at some point as my thoughts started going back and forth between Sarah, Fancy (our soon to be born baby) and God. I remember thinking that it’d be cool for Fancy to be able to say that his/her dad ran a marathon, but then I hoped Fancy wouldn’t be mad that I wasn’t breaking 4 hours (original goal that I gave up on after the pit stop). I’ll try and run a sub-4 marathon in the Fall so Fancy can be all, “Yeah dad got a sub-4”. I also need to lower my time in the event that Fancy decides to run because I always need to have a good I remember when story to bore the kid with. At mile 16, I thought of Sarah’s triumphant Broad Street Run adventure last year when she decided to run the day before, even though she hadn’t been running. She ran the whole thing without any running training, so I figured the last 10 miles would manageable. They surprisingly were. The only issue was the hamstring thing at mile 22. James told me afterwards that he brings aspirins on his runs, so I’ll probably do that next time. F it all. The last mile of the race, I turned off the iPod and listened to the crowd which made the whole thing worth it. I remember running with the right leg that wouldn’t bend anymore and finished feeling pretty damn excited. All in all, I’d rank the experience as a solid 5 out of 5 Netflix stars.

I thought that the marathon would decide if I was going to continue with running or if I’d have my fix and retire to a wonderful hobby-life of making model boats. Two days after the race, I’m feeling ready to go again, so I’m deciding on whether I should try and go faster or farther. I think I’ll opt for farther (maybe further) and sign up for a 50-K. So hang on Fancy, you’re going for a ride.

TTYL,
T. mali

Cupcake Pebbles

So Sarah and I are chilling at Giant last night, walking around, throwing some food into a basket on wheels to hold it until we want to give it to a person who will take it and then ask us for a lot of money to give it back to us. Weird, I know. Why not just avoid the middle man and take it straight to your car? There really isn't much fun in handing this money over to me. Maybe some people get a kick out of it. To each their own. So we're chilling, walking down the cereal aisle, talking about the new Wheaties and how Kevin Garnett is kind of cool because he always blocks after the whistle shot attempts by the other team. Always. Time out will be called, teams will be walking to their huddles, someone on the other team might try to get a practice shot in, and Garnett will stop what he is doing, sprint to the rim and block the shot. I never knew he did this before this weekend. Now that I know he has done this since he's been in the league he has become a player who I never liked post-Timberwolves to a player who I definitely like. Sarah is listening to my Garnett adoration when we both kind of see it. It's one of the cereals that makes you do one of these:



Sarah goes "You're gonna buy that, aren't you?"

I go, well I'm not a Fruity Pebbles fan, but Yes. I will have to buy this. The cereal? Cupcake Pebbles!




Awesome. Needed that cereal. We also bought the Garnett sponsored new Wheaties (I think it's called Fuel) since we only had the Peyton Manning sponsored version at home. Unfortunately I must report that Cupcake Pebbles are really not that great. They are far from necessary. If you are looking for an exciting new cereal, I highly recommend Chocolate Cheerios. They are basically Cocoa Krispies, but in the shape of Cheerios.

Cereal is important. I grew up in a pro-cereal household. Bob, my stepdad, always had a box of Cinnamon Toast Crunch on hand. It was his go to second half Knicks game snack of choice. I was always jealous of this snack. "Can I have some?" "Absolutely not. This is my snack." He would then eat the entire box during the rest of the game. I had to settle for a Kudos bar or some Gushers or something. I never understood this cereal obsession of his until much later when I learned about the side effects of marijuana. Eating a box of CTC in a sitting is like paying for groceries, I guess. You do it because you have to.

2010 NCAA Men's Tournament (Play-in and 1st Round)

Like just about everybody else in the country, I'm picking Winthrop over Arkansas-Pine Bluff in tonight's play-in game. This means you should probably bet on A-PB tonight, because I generally get the play-in game wrong.

A quick note on the NCAA tournament: Do not expand the tournament to 96 teams. The only reason top programs/coaches say they are in favor of this is because they want to make their non-conference regular season schedule even easier than the joke that it already is. In a 96 team format, teams such as Virginia Tech would get into the tournament even though they played nobody (except Temple, who they lost to)prior to conference play starting in January. Keeping Virginia Tech out of the tournament because of its lame non-conference schedule is possibly the only thing that the selection committee got right this year.

Quick thoughts on the regions:

Midwest: At first I thought the East was more stacked, but Mason corrected me and told me to look again. This region is insane, even though it is supposed to be the least insane since the overall #1, Kansas is represented in this region. This team has the best #1 seed, Kansas, the best #2 seed Ohio State (who also has the most dangerous tournament player in Evan Turner), and the hottest #3 seed in Georgetown. An argument could be made for Maryland being the best #4 seed since they have a player similar to Turner who can take over a game at any time in Greivis Vasquez, but I like Wisconsin a little better just because coach Bo Ryan preaches defense and he has Aston, PA roots, and Vanderbilt is also solid in the West. Michigan State had a down year and ended up as a #5 seed, but coach Tom Izzo doesn't get going until March anyway. The #6 seed is one of two teams that beat Kansas this year. The other? Oklahoma State who is the #7 seed. That's messed up. Brutal region. The winner of this region should be the national champion.
My pick for the final four: Ohio State.

East: Kentucky is the second best team in the country and this region's #1. This region should be the second easiest, but instead it is the second most stacked. It has the toughest 8/9 game in Wake Forest/Texas, and if Texas advances it has a good chance at knocking Kentucky out in round 2. I'm pretty sure Texas was #1 in the country about six weeks ago. This region has the country's most pissed off team in West Virginia who should ride their Big East tournament win pretty far. I also like Temple in this region, but they got screwed with their seeding as a 5, and they play the tournament's toughest #12 (Cornell), and then they play Aston, PA's pride and joy in a potential Round 2 match-up against Wisconsin. I have Temple in the Sweet 16, but then running out of gas against John Wall and Kentucky in the Regionals.
My pick for the final four: Kentucky

West: Syracuse, who I picked to win it all...although I pick them to win it all in the years they aren't even in the tournament, are in trouble if Arinze Onuaku is hurt. He hurt his leg in the Big East tournament game vs. Georgetown. I'm not sure the status of his leg as my phone calls to him have gone unreturned. This has been the best regular season Syracuse has had in this decade and it would be nice to cap it off with a nice tourney run, but I think the 7 man rotation that Boeheim uses is going to be a little gassed. I wouldn't even count Vermont out in round 1 as Syracuse has the wonderful ability to play to the level of their opponent at all times (reference pre-season loss to Division II Le Moyne in a game they played full strength). The week 2 matchup vs either Florida State or Gonzaga is also difficult. The rest of the region confuses me. Kansas State, Pittsburgh (one of 3 teams to beat Syracuse this year), Vanderbilt, and Butler (should have been higher) are a solid 2,3,4, and 5, but this region is not nearly as tough as it should be, since Syracuse was the fourth #1.
My pick for the final four: Syracuse

South: This is the WTF region. It is so incredibly horrible, I am considering a boycott. Duke deserves a #1 and they are a strange Duke team since they have a toughness that should gear them for a deeper tournament run than has been the case in years past. They will lose to Louisville in Round 2 though. Duke's year was strange as they finally scheduled some tough non-conference games, including games against Wisconsin, Georgetown, and UConn which they lost two of. Once Duke loses to Louisville it's anybody's region to win. Texas A&M is a real good 5, and the #7 Richmond vs. #10 Saint Mary's game is awesome. Villanova should not have been a #2. That isn't a big deal though. What is a big deal is why they are in this region. Ohio State should have been the #2 in this region and Georgetown should have been the #3. Purdue is a literally hurting #4 as their best player has been out for a couple of weeks. Duke getting this region is the equivalent of David Stern bending the Knicks envelope in the Ewing draft lottery. My pick for the final four is Notre Dame who I absolutely hate, but they win by default. I hate Notre Dame. Luke Harangody is my least favorite player on the planet. I see him coming up big though and ND will continue its end of the season roll in beating Old Dominion, Baylor, Villanova, Texas A&M before falling to Kentucky in the semi-finals. Compare those teams with the Ohio State's potential road: Georgia Tech, Georgetown, Kansas. Weird. My final four pick: Notre Dame


Chances of being correct: 50%

While procrastinating I realigned baseball

Dear Mr. Selig,

Our first baby is going to be born in under two months from now (you're welcome to come to the open house/baby shower if you'd like, as long as you don't make a speech). I have four papers due by the end of the month. I have to run my first marathon in ten days. I have about four phone calls from friends and family that I need to return. I have kitty litter to scoop. I have to catch up on last night's episode of Lost. There is a lot to do. In order to get to these things I need to first write this letter to you that you will probably not read so I can stop thinking about it. However if you do read this letter, you will see that your special committee to fix baseball is no longer needed. Since it is highly unlikely that a salary cap will ever be agreed upon, I will do what I can to fix baseball and make it as fair of a game as it can be in a capless world for all the little children in all of the cities in this great land of ours.

My co-worker Mr. Hall sent me a link to an article on Sports Illustrated by Mr. Verducci. The purpose of this article was to alert us fans about your special committee that was going to analyze the game of baseball. This committee would brainstorm many ideas on how to fix America's (and Toronto's) game. Mr. Verducci reported that one of the things that would be considered is a realignment that could potentially be adjusted every year depending on pay roll, success, and a team's commitment to competing (which made me laugh for a good solid minute). While I understand that this is just an idea that is thrown out in a brainstorm, there are aspects of it that could work and should be applied for the 2012 season.

Before I get to realignment, I'd like to quickly address a couple of things that need fixing. Stop making the All-Star game determine the home field for the World Series. This idea has failed miserably. To make players have some incentive to play hard in this game, simply make the participating bonus higher for the winning team. Another quick point that I'd like to address is please do not expand the use of instant replay. The home run instant replay is ok and we will leave that in place. Do not put add anymore instant replays. To make umpiring better, please analyze the events seen in the NFL Scouting Combine. Umpires should be able to complete these skill challenges under a to be determined mark. If they can't, they will not be allowed to blow meaningful calls in a playoff series (reference the Yankees-Twins 2009 divisional round series.)

It has been brought to my attention for the past 15 years that baseball has not been very fair. As a Yankees fan living in Philadelphia I naturally tend to ignore these claims, but I have decided to keep an open mind recently and acknowledge that the Yankees high payroll allows their players to buy the best performance-enhancing drugs money can buy. I'm pretty sure that even Mr. Zila can acknowledge that there is an element of unfairness in Major League Baseball today. In order to establish my new, and slightly Marxist, realignment, it will require a final ruling on the use of the DH.

The fact that there is a DH in one league and not a DH in the other league makes MLB the stupidest sport on the planet when it comes to determining a true champion. Having a DH or not having a DH completely affects how you manage your game. It also determines how you build your roster. To require a team to play 162+ games one way, and then to suddenly require them to change to the other league's style of play for 3 or 4 games in the most meaningful series, the World Series is absolutely absurd. No other professional sport has anything like this. To make a comparison, it would be like saying that in the NFL, only AFC teams are allowed to have kickers on their roster. In the NFC, you are not allowed to carry a kicker on your team. You would require the quarterback to make all kicks and punts. Even college football's BCS makes more sense in determining a champion, because at least the two teams determined by a robot are prepared to play the same game.

Once you, the owner's, and the player's get over yourself and add or subtract the DH permanently from the game, we can begin to seriously discuss a realignment. Out of all the realignment models that I have seen, Fox Sports Mr. Rosenthal presents the best model which I have tweaked slightly. I have also added names to the divisions. Here it is:

EAST


Clemente Division:
Yanks
Mets
Orioles
BJs
Nats

Koufax Division:
Red Sox
Reds
Phillies
Pirates
Marlins

Ruth Division:
Twins
Tigers
Indians
Rays
Braves

WEST

Mays Division:
Seattle
Giants
A's
Dodgers
Angels

Robinson Division:
Royals
Padres
Cardinals
Cubs
Brewers

Aaron Division:
Rangers
white sox
Diamondbacks
Rockies
Astros

The 162 schedule would stay in tact and it would be broken down as follows. I will do it from an East Coast perspective, but it is the same for the west.

Everyone in the East would play each other 10 times, which would make up 140 games. That leaves 22 more games. 15 of these games would be spent playing a division from the West Coast. This will change every year on a three year cycle, so one year the Clemente's will play the Aaron, the following year the Clemente's will play the Robinson, and the third year the Clemente's will play the Say Hey's. This leaves 7 games. These 7 games are determined similarly to how the NFL creates parity in their scheduling. The 7 remaining games would be determined on how a team finished the year before. Using last year as an example, the Yankees would play the Phillies for an additional 4 game series, and then they will have a 3 game series with the Red Sox. The Nationals on the other hand will have a 4 game series with the Orioles and a 3 game series with the Pirates.

I know what you are thinking, but what about all that $$$ generated from Yankees-Red Sox on TV. In this model, you would lose 6 or 7 of those games, but you have now developed 7 more Yankees-Phillies games in a regular season, which in the long run may create a bigger rivalry because Philadelphia-New York is a little closer than New York-Boston. In addition, you have Philadelphia-Baltimore playing more, which is promoting people from different cities to travelling shorter distances to seeing their home team on the road more regularly.

The playoff set-up would be the same. There will be 3 divisional leaders and 1 Wild Card. This may cause the argument to come up if you are a Toronto Blue Jay stuck playing against the big spending Yankees and Mets, while the Ruth division is filled with a bunch of poor hacks. Let's say that one year the Yankees win the division and the Mets win the wild card, but the Blue Jays finish with a better record than the divisional winner of the Ruth division (in this hypothetical it is the Tigers because we are going to assume that Miguel Cabrera has stayed sober.) While the Blue Jays will miss the playoffs and sort of be screwed that year, the following year they will be rewarded for their accomplishment and they will be relocated to the Aaron division in exchange for the worst team from that division. You can argue that this presents an unfair advantage for the Yankees because their division has weakened considerably, you will realize that for the first time Toronto will now be in a position to win the division because they only have to jump over the Tigers who they had a better winning % last year, or they now have a better opportunity to win the wild card. The Yankees would once again have to play the tougher schedule, while the crappy team that came over will have the weakest schedule out of anybody, which makes it somewhat possible for the Yankees to fall.

If you would like to discuss any of the points I have made, please feel free to contact me by replying to this email. I would be happy to disprove any argument you may have.

Regards,

Mr. Kurpel

cars

When I was shorter and younger, one of my favorite things to do in the house was to play with miniature cars. I had a pretty awesome mat that I would unfold and put on the floor. This mat had a picture of a town on it and a bunch of roads. I can't remember too much about the mat, except that it had most small town staples like a hospital, police station, couple of houses, airport, grocery store, and an auto race track. I guess back in the mid-80s, towns were set-up in a way that you could shoot on over to the town race track and take out some much needed aggression before/after shopping for groceries. When I was make believe driving, my day usually consisted of leaving the house, heading to the race track for a couple of laps, then driving to the fire station where I worked, taking out the fire truck, and then taking that to the race track for a nice burnout session when none of the other buildings on the mat were on fire, which was often, but no emergency was that urgent that there couldn't be at least one lap done at the track.

Cars back then in my town were pretty awesome. They were a lot like Toyotas are today...tons of acceleration and breaking problems. I remember sitting there and being amazed at how many cars would all of a sudden go out of control and slam into my living room wall. Some days the cars would get serious air and disappear into the couch forever. I think it would be cool to one day find the actual town that this mat was modelled after. K?

perceptions

The snow started falling in the morning. It was early, but not too early. The only reason it was early was because it was not late. And it wasn’t on time. So by default it will be classified as early. But to be fair it was closer to on time than it was to too early. This mattered did not to Tilbin. Tilbin not matter did or give a care about when or how or what it snowed. As long as he could see his neighbor’s house across the street he was happy.

When the snow started falling, Tilbin was at his window staring at her house across the street. She was not awake yet since it was early. But when Tilbin glanced at his watch he realized that she would be awake soon. Tilbin figured he had a few moments though, and decide he did to get a cup of tea. When Tilbin turned around to go into the kitchen and away from the window, she made her move.

She knew Tilbin had been watching her. Bother her it did some but not as much as you would think. If it truly bothered her she would have closed her window or threw a bullet or called a police. But since she bothered was not by the gaze of Tilbin, she let it happen. As time wore on she began to like being watched. She had little interest of meeting Tilbin, but she looked forward to the mornings and the evenings when he was there. The time in between when work she must had to, she found herself sitting and longing for Tilbin’s presence across the street. Once she thought she saw Tilbin across from her office. She felt more confident out city in so she took a break and ran to see him. When she got there she found that what she thought Tilbin to be was nothing but a pile of rotting newspapers if newspapers rotted instead of being read.

While Tilbin was making his tea, she quickly got out of bed. She put on a bathrobe and some slippers and ran into the snowy morning. She dashed across the street and up to Tilbin’s door. Hesitantly at first she started to knock. After a minute she knocked with more purpose. There was no answer.

Upstairs, Tilbin was back at his window, drinking his tea. Across the street, a lonely bird landed in the bird feeder in her yard. Tilbin smiled the bird at the sight.