Narwhals

In a highly unshocking announcement, Barack Obama has decided to cut funding to NASA's Constellation program, which was a program dedicated to figuring out a way to bring people "back" to the moon. Instead of wasting NASA's time in refiguring out ways to get to the moon, Obama and NASA agreed to leave that up to the private sector, which includes the balloon boy's dad and Jim down the street. Obama insisted that the money that will be budgeted for NASA will be used to figure out how to get people farther into space, faster and cheaper, in a commendable effort to solve unemployment. Since the moon has proven to be rather boring, NASA will try to get these people, and a handful of narwhals to more exotic locations such as Mars and Jupiter.

As a moon enthusiast, I am very upset with this turn of events. As a card carrying member of the Smithsonian Institute I longed for the day we, as Americans, landed on the moon once again to put another flag next to the one that already exists there. I really do not see the purpose of bringing narwhals to Mars or Jupiter.

Angrily yours,
MM